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Post by Branden Devereaux on Sept 19, 2007 21:18:02 GMT -5
"I was like that with Alex up until, like two hours ago. The good memories hurt more then the bad did. Because he was like all of the bad memories thrown into one. But the good memories made me think about what he used to be like." He said and then listened to all that she said. It was clear to him that she still missed her father a lot. He never knew what it was like to have somebody that you were very close to die. But he heard that it was a very hard thing and that you never really got over it. He knew how lucky he was that Alex hadn't died by "accidentally" taking a few more painkillers or something. Since now that he thought about it Alex really could have just ended things on many occasions but he hadn't. Now his old self was really showing through and he was glad that Jeanette had gotten to see what Alex was really like in person. "I suppose that you are right, but I don't really know what it's like to lose somebody." He said and then jumped slightly when he heard a car horn beep.
"Seriously? I was one of your wishes, wow. I must say that I am very amazed that I was one. At least my parents actually like you they haven't like a lot of people that I went out with." He said and then looked over at the building. If they stayed out here any longer then Alex might not believe he had to make a call. "We'd better be getting back in there. Since I don't want Alex to think that something happened to me. Since he's more paranoid then I am." He said before looking back at her.
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Post by Jeanette Panagiotou on Sept 19, 2007 21:32:32 GMT -5
She laid her head listening to him as he talked. She sighed softly asshe listened to the sound of his voice. She understood. She just wished that the memories didn't hurt so much. She listened to him, but her head came up when he said he didn't know what it was like to lose someone so close. She nodded gently. "Consider yourself lucky. It's a lot of heartbreak to lose someone you love so much. I'm sure Ryan would agree with me on that." She said gently looking at him for a minute.
She looked back to the building in thought. She looked back to him and smiled sweetly. "Well, I didn't wish for you personally, but I did ask for someone who could fill at least a part of that hole in my heart. You showed me that I wasn't the only person who suffered from things like what I've been through. Alex has been through just about the same amount of things from my accident as his. I've got a little more hardware in my leg than him, but you saw that I could use my experience to get through to other people too. I never thought of that until you came along." She said gently looking him in the eyes. She looked down at his chest for a moment while he looked back to the building.
She nodded her head gently. "Yeah." She said gently as she wrapped her arm through his and she started to gently lead him back to Alex's room. "You know, since you've been through so much in the past week and a half, why don't I treat you to dinner at my place tomorrow night. Mama's been dying to meet you and she'd very much love to. Me and her could fix an authentic Greek meal for the evening." She said gently looking up at Thomas as they walked through the slidding doors..
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Post by Branden Devereaux on Sept 19, 2007 21:58:21 GMT -5
It took him a moment to register what she said but when he did he realized that Ryan must have told her about Greg. He must have really trusted her because he never talked about him to strangers. Heck, he never really talked about Greg in front of him. He figured that it was because he'd never known him personally. Not to mention the only reason he'd met Ryan when he had was because his parents had been worried about how he'd isolated himself. He could still remember the first time he'd met him and he had looked so lost and alone. Not to mention Ryan had acted really shy, which was hard to believe now. Since now Ryan would talk to any person at least once and if they didn't interest him then he wouldn't speak with them again. "I guess he would agree with you. He doesn't really speak about the loss of Greg too much though." He said and looked at her, he never wanted to lose anybody that he was close to but he knew that it would happen eventually.
"Well I wouldn't think that you wished for me because you didn't know me. I don't think that I showed you all of that though, I think that Alex did most of the work. I just brought you to him and he fought like there was no tomorrow." He said and then looked into her eyes, he would never take credit for something like that. Since in his mind, Alex was the one who had cast a spell over the two of them. He made them want to help them by the two of them witnessing how much he spiraled downward in a short amount of time. "Ok, that does sound really nice. Especially since I haven't eaten a good meal in ages." He said as he tried not to look at everything around him.
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Post by Jeanette Panagiotou on Sept 20, 2007 6:30:19 GMT -5
She looked at him as he seemed confused for a moment. She saw what she said click though. Ryan had told her, yeah, but he didn't really want to. She remembered that day clearly. She nodded her head gently. "He doesn't talk about it because it hurts too much. He keeps it all bottled up from what I see. I never liked keeping my emotions bottled up and I never really could. That's why I talk about it. You accept what's happened easier when you talk about it." She said gently looking around in thought before she looked back up at him.
She smiled gently and sighed and she laid her head on his shoulder. "Alex may have done most of the work, but if you hadn't come along to the ice rink that day then I never would have had the chance to meet you or Alex." She said gently looking back up at him. She listened to him and smiled brightly when he accepted the offer. She leaned up and kissed him sweetly on the cheek. "Oh, don't worry, Mama'll see you and probably try to stuff you with as much food as possible." She teased sweetly looking up at him. She could tell he was trying not to see nervous in the building, but she could feel how tense he felt. She took his hand in hers and gave it a gentle comforting squeeze.
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Post by Branden Devereaux on Sept 20, 2007 20:28:05 GMT -5
Usually he would keep things bottled up inside too, although things usually slowly leak out. Like his frustration for example, it was one of the reasons why he'd been so forceful with Alex. And now that he really thought about it the way that he'd acted around him last week was actually rather stupid. If somebody had basically fought with him then he'd probably do the same things that Alex did. Although he most likely wouldn't shout comments about them, he'd be too busy getting his frustration out physically for that. He didn't fight too much though, since normally he didn't think there was a reason to. But for some reason he thought that it was necessary with Alex and well, it was obvious that hadn't ended too well for him. "I keep things bottled up too, it just kind of comes out slowly most of the time though. Sometimes it will come out as one big rush and that's not good." He said and then looked straight ahead as a nurse came too close for comfort. Jeanette had witnessed him coming undone a few times, and for him that was a few times too many. Since he really hated having people see him lose it.
"There is the chance that you might have ran into him. But I don't think you would have gotten him to talk." He said and then thought about what might have happened if she would have met Alex first. Number one, she might have thought of him as a bad person since Alex really hadn't thought too highly of him. Number two, Alex might have yelled at her and/or tried to hurt her. Even though Alex really hadn't been too violent he had his moments. Now, he didn't think that Alex would be violent since he never was before. "Really, well maybe I'll just spend these few weeks getting fat and lazy. I was thinking about not even singing back on for the football team. They can probably find a replacement." He said and then stopped in front of Alex's room and looked into the window. Ryan was sitting on the edge of the bed and seemed to be in a deep conversation with Alex. It made him wonder what they were talking about.
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Post by Jeanette Panagiotou on Sept 20, 2007 20:38:05 GMT -5
She looked at him and frowned softly. She wasn't going to say anything about it though. She didn't find it healthy for peaopled to keep their emotions bottled up. A lot of times they would blow up in someone's face and really hurt them. She felt him tense when the nurse walked by and she gave his hand a gentle squeeze. She looked around then back to him.
She nodded her head softly looking at him. "I may have ran into him, but I never would have been able to use my story to try and get through to him." She said gently as they stopped infront of Alex's room window. She looked in at Ryan and Alex and smiled gently. She looked back up at him with a look of utter shock on her face. "No, you can't do that. I thought football was important to you?" She said gently moving infront of him looking up at him a little worried with what he said.
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Post by Branden Devereaux on Sept 20, 2007 21:13:05 GMT -5
"Football is important to me but there's no way that I can stay in shape while I'm healing. I might be able to if my ribs weren't messed up but it probably would even hurt to slowly jog. I know right now I couldn't anyway but still, maybe it would just be best if I quit. Not to mention it would make somebody's day to get my spot." He said and then sighed as he watched Alex and Ryan for a few more moments before he entered the room. Both of them looked up when they heard the door close and he quickly made his way over to where the two of them were. He noticed that Alex was tightly holding onto the teddy bear that he'd gotten years ago. But he wasn't going to say anything about it he looked over to Ryan and realized that he seemed to be looking at him differently and it made him wonder why that was. Had he turned pale all of a sudden or something? "So, what did the doctor say Alex?" He asked as he tried to think of something to say.
Alex looked up at Thomas when he heard his question but he didn't answer it right away. But that was only because he was trying to think of something to say. "He said that it seems like there's something wrong with the pins. But he doesn't know for sure and he said that my left leg seemed a little swollen. Then he commented how I seemed to have very little leg muscle." He said and then was silent for a few moments before a very tiny tear slipped out. "I don't want to have another surgery." He said and then looked down at the ground.
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Post by Jeanette Panagiotou on Sept 20, 2007 21:36:17 GMT -5
She frowned gently looking at him. She was about to argue with him, but she decided not to considering where they were. She looked away unhappy that he would give up something so important just because of a few broken ribs that would be better in no time. She looked up at watched him walk into the room for a moment before she followed him into the room.
She watched the three of them and noticed that Ryan had paled. She eyed him with a worried expression, but her attention turned to Alex as he spoke. She frowned and watched him gently in understanding. After going through four or five surgeries of her own she could understand why he didn't want another one. She walked over and squatted down in front of him. She looked at him and gave him a comforting smile. "I don't blame you for it. You've been through enough of them and you don't want to go through another. You don't have to if you really don't, but it may be better for you." She said gently looking into his eyes with her own green eyes. "Alex, you have been through so much in the last two years, and I find you're very brave for everything you've been through. I barely made it through the four or five surgeries I've been in much less the depression. It's your decision to make and no one's going to think any less of you if you don't have the surgery." She said gently looking at him searching his eyes for the tiniest hint of anything. She reached her hand out and wiped away the tear gently and looked at him with understanding deep in her eyes.
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Post by Branden Devereaux on Sept 20, 2007 21:58:37 GMT -5
"I know I have to have it because I can't just go through the rest of my life hurt like I am now. Not to mention I fall down a lot and when it hurts even more to get back up you just want to lay there for the rest of the time." He said as he tried to hold back more tears but it was proving to be a very hard task to accomplish. He felt Jeanette wipe the tear away and he closed his eyes for a moment as he tried to keep his emotions in check."The first few surgeries were fine but after them it really hurt to do anything. And then after having several of them I didn't care what happened. Since after the first one I'd decided that basketball was out of the picture." He said as he looked at her, he wasn't going to tell her how lonely he'd felt since nobody had even been there for him. Thomas had been kept away most of the time and talking to different people at the hospital could only help so much. He did have to give them some credit though, they seemed to know when he was at the peak of his loneliness. Because of all that they'd done for him in those lonely times he had learned that most people in the hospital are not bad people. Which was why he trusted them a little more then Thomas did. Although he was still very edgy when a doctor or nurse came around.
((And now it's my bedtime.))
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Post by Jeanette Panagiotou on Sept 21, 2007 6:25:16 GMT -5
She listened to him. She could tell he wanted to cry and she could understand his need to, but she knew he wasn't going to do it here infront of Ryan and Thomas or her, for that matter. She frowned as she listened to him. She shook her head gently. "No, basketball isn't out of the picture. Not yet anyways. This next sergury that they want to do could help build up your leg. I had a friend back in Greece and he played soccer with a prosthetic leg. I'm sure if he can play soccer with a fake leg you can play basketball. Soccer takes a lot more leg strength than basketball too." She said gently looking at him hoping that it would get his hopes up some. Truth was he could probably still play basketball. His sports were stil within reach. Her's weren't, or at least, she wouldn't ever be able to compete in figure skating again. It kind of made her sad to think of that, but she pushed her feelings aside. Right now she wanted to focus on Alex.
"Don't let the things you love go down the drain because of your leg. You're dreams are probably still within reach. I may be able to figure skate still, but my leg can't take the jumps. My dreams really are down the drain, but yours aren't yet, and don't let them. Please don't let them because I hate to see someone give their dreams up when they can do it. Because I know I can't have my dreams and I hate the idea that someone capable of reaching theirs thinks they can't." She said gently watching him and searching his eyes for some form of understanding. She was hoping that Thomas was really listening close too because some of this wasn't meant just for Alex. Some of it was for both Thomas and Alex
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Post by Branden Devereaux on Sept 22, 2007 19:55:42 GMT -5
He listened to what she said and tried to think of a way to tell her that he knew that he was physically capable of playing basketball again. It just was that he simply did not want to since he knew that people would stare at him. Not to mention they'd start to feel sorry for him if he missed every single shot you tried to make. Sure he'd heard the saying "the only stupid shots you make are the ones that you don't do." But those words would not satisfy him not when he had been one of the upcoming stars of the basketball team. When he'd been playing he had hardly ever missed. He couldn't bear to try and play yet miss every single shot. Surely Thomas would understand that, he was hoping so since he didn't want to get forced into playing again. "I know that I could play if I wanted to. But I just don't want to, it's too hard to think of what might have been if the accident had never happened. Not to mention I'm probably not good at it anymore." He said and then looked over at Thomas to try and see if there was any hint of understanding in his voice. But Thomas appeared to be in deep thought about something. His eyes then wandered over to Ryan, he seemed to be listening yet he too didn't show any emotion. Finally, his eyes made their way over to where Jeanette was. He was expecting her to say something else to him.
Thomas had been listening to Jeanette and he knew that some of what she had said had probably been directed at him in a way. He knew of several members on the team that would be very mad if he didn't come back, especially since this was supposed to be his last year with the football team. But he still thought that it was pointless to go back they'd all see how out of shape he was and just write him off anyway. He listened to what Alex said and he could tell that deep down inside, Alex was scared about trying to play basketball again. He didn't blame him though since if he was in Alex's position he would be scared too. Now that he thought about it, he probably would have given it up and decided that he'd just coach a team of elementary kids or something. Wait, maybe that was how the two of them could find out if Alex had lost any of his basketball skills. "Alex, you know that you don't have to give up basketball entirely. You can probably find some team to coach." He said and then looked at Alex as he waited for a reply. He knew that Alex would make a very good coach since he'd always been patient with people. But, the question was would Alex go for it.
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Post by Maddison West on Sept 22, 2007 20:46:44 GMT -5
She listened to him and thought for a moment looking at the teddy bear in his arms. He sounded so much like she had after her accident. She wanted so bad to shake her head and say that if he really wanted to he could be just as good as he had been before, but she didn't know if that was true. She had been trying for months now to be even half as good as she had been before her accident, but she wasn't even close to that these days.She looked up at him as he looked from Thomas to Ryan and back to her. She knew he was expecting her to say something, but she didn't She stood up and stepped away from the bed and walked over to a small window that allowed him to look out at some of the city of Twin Lakes.
She didn't know what else to say. She looked down at the floor shifting her weight over to right leg as she felt a shar pain. She didn't know why or how, but that sharp pain set off a flashback in her head and she frowned when the image of her brother and mother looking down at her in the hospital came to her. She shook it out of her head and looked out the window once more.
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Post by Anthony Wallace on Sept 22, 2007 21:10:41 GMT -5
Alex watched as she walked away and he wondered why that was. He something that he'd said upset her or something? He really hoped not because he knew that he was in a depressed mood and that it was probably affecting Thomas. He really wanted to get up and make his way over to her and see what was wrong but there was no way that his leg would permit that at the moment. If Thomas did not make his way over to her soon then he was really going to say something to him. Since he should know better by now that something was wrong and that he should go over there and see what the problem was. If he could see it then Thomas definitely could since he didn't know Jeanette too well. "I just wish that this could have never happened, none of it. Maybe things would be a whole lot different." He said and then rolled over on his side and faced the wall.
Thomas watched as Jeanette got up and he knew that he should go over and see what the problem was but he was worried about Alex. He seemed to have taken a turn for the worse again. But he knew that this was probably something that should be expected. After all, he was probably feeling sorry for himself and all of the things that he'd done. "Alex, I know how you wish that none of this had happened. But you've got to admit to yourself that you can't change the past." He said and then watched as he rolled over before getting up and making his way over to where Jeanette was. "Are you alright?" He asked quietly, he knew that the doctors probably wouldn't allow them to stay for too much longer since they probably hadn't expected them to stay this long.
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Post by Jeanette Panagiotou on Sept 22, 2007 21:48:32 GMT -5
She reached to the locket looking out at the window. She heard Alex and she closed her eyes and gripped the locket gently thinking of her father. She heard Thomas's voice adressing Alex then she heard him right behind her. She turned to him still gripping the locket tightly. She looked at Thomas and shook her head gently. "I don't know, I need to get out of here." She said gently as she reached her hand up to her nose. She pinched the bridge of her nose as she felt a headache coming on. She looked back up to Alex then at Thomas with an apologetically sympathetic expression. It was kind of her fault that Alex was acting the way he was now.
She was starting to feel bad because she had given him all the advice and pleading she could. She couldn't try and encourage him to do what he loved because she couldn't even doing what she wanted anymore.
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Post by Anthony Wallace on Sept 23, 2007 16:03:23 GMT -5
"If you need to get out of here then we can get out of here. Because I think that if we stay here any longer then we are going to get Alex upset or something. Since I can tell that he really wants to cry and that he's just holding things back because we're here. Not to mention, I really need to get out of here too." He said and then instinctively reached for the keys to his truck before he realized that Ryan must have them. After all, he was the one who had driven the four of them over here. He quickly began to make his way toward the door before he turned around and looked at Ryan and Alex. "Um, I think that we'd better get out of here before we get accused of loitering or something. Not to mention, I've got some things that I have to do." He said and then watched as Ryan got up and made his way over to him. He really didn't have anything that he had to do but he figured that he needed to make up an excuse so that Alex didn't think that they were leaving just because he was upset. Which wasn't true at all, they were leaving because both Jeanette and him really needed to get out of this place as fast as possible.
Alex heard Ryan get up and he heard what Thomas said and he quickly tried to think of something to say. "Ok, then I guess that I'll just take a nap until I get woken up by somebody." He said and then closed his eyes and began to slowly drift off to sleep.
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